Charlotte's Journey Home

Just a Regular Kid, Sort Of


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On the 366th Day We Rejoice, A Cardiology Update

For most of the year, we can ignore that Charlotte is a heart patient. She keeps up with her friends, grows so much that we forget the terrible “failure to thrive” days, and seems about as regular as the next kid.

That was different last year, of course, since she had to take a break from her regularly scheduled awesomeness to awe us with her post-heart surgery resilience. Charlotte recovered beautifully and returned to regular activities on schedule. She trained for a 5K and took tennis lessons. Once her surgical wounds had healed, she moved on. Sort of. If we didn’t talk about the scar. (That’s another story for another day. Suffice to say that a preteen girl is self-conscious about a new scar.)

Then she had her six month check up and the scar began to fade. In the past few months, the surgery has become an anecdote. “Remember when I was mean because I was taking Dilaudid?” “Remember what I said when they removed my breathing tube?” “I didn’t mind the hospital so much. I got to have pudding for breakfast and got lots of presents.”

Yesterday we were reminded, as we are each year, that heart surgery isn’t the stuff that normal childhood memories are made of. It’s real. It’s traumatic. It’s serious. But, it also gives us the chance to visit with the excellent Dr. Young and the incomparable Elizabeth Capella, LPN.

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I’ll spare you the thousand words–what you see here is a perfect heart. Or at least as perfect as Charlotte’s mended heart will get. Her bloodflow velocity holds steady at 2.5 (normal is around 1.8; this elevation is to be expected given her conduit). She has no evidence of stenosis or other complications And best of all, while Charlotte was terribly uncomfortable with the idea of a male sonographer, she took a deep breath, focused on the Harry Potter movie and let Mr. Peng take her pictures.

We’re back to annual check ups.

Team Charlotte, gear up for Move for the Kids 2016. So much to celebrate. Charlotte dares you to RUN it with her. Click to join Team Charlotte, or donate if you can’t participate.

MFTK 2015

 

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Flashback #6: Have You Heard Charlotte Tell Her Own Story? (#CHDAware, #TBT)

Without further ado, my post from February 24, 2015:

“Charlotte’s Story: The Road to a Healthy Heart”

Sometimes I’m so proud of my kiddo, I could just burst. This is one of those moments. She was asked earlier this month if she would contribute a blog post to “Life Inside Lurie Children’s: The Official Blog of Ann & Robert H. Lurie Children’s Hospital.” Despite the month she knew she had planned, she said yes. And she said it without hesitation.  We talked a lot about what she’d write, but she didn’t start drafting it until February 14, just 3 days after her surgery. She dictated it to me.

So without further, ado, I invite you to follow the link below to read Charlotte’s Story: The Road to a Healthy Heart. Or, read it below:

*Bonus for reading to the end–there’s a video)

February 23, 2015

Charlotte, age 9,underwent her third open-heart surgery at Lurie Children’s just days ago. She shares her story below in honor of American Heart Month.

Hi. My name is Charlotte, and I’ve been a patient at Lurie Children’s since I was 12 hours old. In January 2005, I was diagnosed when my mom was pregnant with me with a congenital heart defect called truncus arteriosus. I was supposed to be born in June, but I arrived a little bit early, on May 9. I’ve been going to Lurie Children’s for follow-ups my whole life. Continue reading


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Flashback #5: Bringing Her Home (#CHDAware)

Sometimes the words of a song are just the words of a song. A beautiful haunting lyric that draws you back over and over, but still just a song. Then, sometimes the same song hits you differently. Tonight, listening to Alfie Boe sing “Bring Him Home,” I felt the song as only a parent can. And as I felt the song, Charlotte laced her fingers through mine and whispered, “Chills.” Jean Valjean prays to God to bring Marius home, to let him live. Truly, those are the only thoughts that go through a parents mind when their child in on the operating table. Any operating table. I don’t care if the general anesthesia is for ear tubes, a tonsillectomy, a heart surgery or a lung transplant. When the doctors wheel your baby away, and you have no control….that’s the sentiment, the lament, the prayer.

And when they say to you, “Okay, you can take her home today,” you cry precious tears of relief. And realize how very lucky you are to hear those words, and no other words.

Last February 17 we heard those words. Yesterday, we were too busy jamming to Gloria & Emilio Estefan’s excellent and joyous On Your Feet to even think about it. Chills indeed.

So, for “throwback Thursday,” I give you Flashback #5: February 17, 2015:

Current StatusSitting in the living room playing Katamino waiting for sushi to be delivered.

Medical UpdateSitting in the living room playing Katamino waiting for sushi to be delivered.

But seriously, Charlotte was discharged around 2:30 today. The day consisted of removing the central line, which was a bit difficult but not nearly as traumatic and traumatizing as any other removal has been. In between crying that she couldn’t do it, Charlotte breathed (deep breath in, breath out “sushi”), and  giggled at Despicable Me 2. Once the central line was removed, she had to lie flat-ish for about 30 minutes. Then we went downstairs for a chest x-ray.

After the chest x-ray, we waited for the prescription delivery and to get the last peripheral IV out.  That last thing is what took the longest, and what made me the most proud.

Charlotte hates having things put in or taken out (can you blame her?) and she also dislikes having medical teams hover around her.

So, she insisted on taking the PIV out herself. Her excellent RN, Katie, sat on one side of the bed, Phil an I on the other. While Katie walked us through the discharge instructions, Charlotte worked on the tegaderm surrounding the IV. She worked and worked, listening to some Katy Perry and Taylor Swift. She vacillated between “I can’t do this” and “I’ve got this.”  The last little bit was really difficult. Both Katie and then Holly, the APN on duty, helped Charlotte strategize how to approach the tape.

Finally, she got all worked up, “I can’t do this. I’m never going to be able to do this.” Then silence, then “Oh, it’s out.”

She did. The sushi is here. Have a good night, ya’ll.

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Charlotte heads home wearing sweat pants and fancy boots. Best combination ever. (Caption credit: Charlotte)

 

 

 


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Flashback #4: What does awesome mean to you? (#CHDAware)

A year ago, Charlotte declared her status to be “Awesome as usual.” Today, 370 days after her third open heart surgery, I can attest that awesome IS usual for her. And by “awesome” I mean causing feelings related to the “dread, veneration, and wonder that is inspired by authority or by the sacred or sublime,” as defined by Merriam-Wesbster. I am awed, truly, by modern medicine. When I think that had I been born with truncus arteriosis type I, I likely would not be writing this blog post, I can’t help but feel veneration for the scientists who dared to dream that they could fix a broken heart. If those surgeons want to think they are gods, well, probably they are at the very least, godlike.

Now for the Flashback: 2/15/2015: Current status: Charlotte says that her current status is “Awesome as usual.” Clearly, her ego has recovered 🙂 She’s weaning herself from all things “i” and spent the morning on a craft project sent by a most excellent pair of twin 10-year olds. They also sent stuffed versions of what Charlotte misses most from home.With Ty Fred and Ginger

 

Medical update: The writing of this blog post was interrupted for…the removal of the chest tubes! Charlotte was a bit anxious about it so we medicated her. The Versed kicked in right after the tubes came out so she is blissfully listening to Taylor Swift right now and telling me how good her lemonade is.

After chest tubes were removed, Charlotte had an x-ray. She needs an echo. With normal results on those two things her central line should come out tomorrow and then we get to go home!

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Let me check out my lung x-ray. I can see the wire around the conduit. Cool. (Umm….no comments about my bed head, please!)

In the meantime, she’s been taking bigger and bigger walks. One big goal was to visit the Founder’s Board Treehouse on the 12th floor.DSCN1220

 

Mission accomplished! Lindsay, the APN on duty today, believes Charlotte won’t remember this visit or photo, so we’ll go again later.

We’re down to Lasix once a day, baby aspirin, pain meds as needed and Miralax. While she will go home with a few meds, nothing is long term.

On a sad note, Bubba’s nose is falling off. We’ve had to call in reinforcements. Introducing “the spare bear.”

DSCN1215Today’s cheery update brought to you by the “Flock of Docs.” That’s Dr. Backer all the way to the left. He’s pretty happy about today’s news!

Flock of Docs


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Flashback #2: Partying through Pre-Op to Mend a Broken Heart (#CHDAware))

Every 6 months I go through the heart momma ritual: I brew a cuppa (today it was tea) and dial the cardiologist’s office to schedule our follow up. And today, that phone call topped my to do list. We have every reason to believe that it will be a routine visit, lots of images, and then a lovely chat with Dr. Young. But…no heart mother (or father) ever stops worrying or ever stops bracing herself for that other kind of appointment. In November 2014, we had that other kind of appointment. We expected it, anticipated it, and were still gobsmacked by it. Still angry at the injustice of our kid having to go through this kind of heartache, literally.

Today’s flashback will take you to February 9, 2015 the day before her scheduled surgery.

It includes a tribute to the children who made it clear that their hearts would hold Charlotte’s while she underwent surgery and recovered. I am grateful to them and their teacher every day. (Fair warning: I cried AGAIN when I watched the video.

February 10, 2015: Pre-Op The lead up to the pre-op appointment started in the most wonderful way. Charlotte’s classmates threw her a surprise party. While she was, I think, most thrilled with the gifts (especially an Equestria and Monster High Dolls), we were touched by the fact that the party was the idea of two of Charlotte’s classmates and the joy of the rest of them. The children put their hearts and souls into letting Charlotte know that they would miss her, that they will be thinking about her, and that she has an incredible network of support.

We spent the weekend playing with friends and generally not thinking about what was on deck for this week.

We also began a mindfulness practice late last week to practice breathing through fears, especially fears of needles.

This morning my friend Jeanne came to work with Charlotte, using an energy technique called EFT Tapping. Charlotte did as good a job as she could working with Jeanne, though she did lose focus once she realized that there were still crepes in the refrigerator. She did seem relaxed and ready for anything when we left the house.

Now, Jeanne and I realized that one tapping session and a few meditation sessions might not help her enough. But, Charlotte was willing and it was worth a try.

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I got a smile from her when I told her that Bubba was looking down from atop her head and smiling. I had to take this photo to prove it!

I wish I could say it worked miraculously. Sadly, no. Charlotte began to fall apart when it was time to change in to a hospital gown for the lung x-ray. The little tigers seemed babyish to her. Then the x-ray technician called her “sweetie” and told her she couldn’t hold Bubba during the x-ray. Charlotte’s dark side started seeping out. She was muttering, crying, on the verge of a meltdown. I snuck Bubba under her thumb and we got out of there as unscathed as possible.

She calmed down and seemed to set her mind to getting through the blood draw. Until we entered the room. I’ll spare you the details, you can get the general idea from the last time we did this. Truthfully, I’m sparing me the details. I don’t have the heart to write about this again. Bottom line–this time was a bit worse. We were better prepared; instead of a phlebotomist, we had a member of the IV team to do the draw. We called Child Life to distract. And still, Charlotte just couldn’t concentrate on hertools.We tried breathing. She didn’t want to tap, so I tried another technique Jeanne taught me, squeezing Charlotte’s finger tips while quietly talking to her. Eventually she said, “Mom, stop squeezing my fingers.” Sigh.

Eventually (maybe 40 minutes later?) the IV team member had to go to the ICU so she called cardiology and we went down to see the APN (advanced practice nurse) for our pre-op conversation. The nurse and Dr. Backer spoke while we went down and they decidedFullSizeRender-4that they could get the blood once Charlotte is under anesthesia tomorrow. It’s not ideal–it will add time to the procedure and the time that Charlotte is under anesthesia, but since they couldn’t sedate her today, it was the best we could do.

Maria, the APN, explained the procedure and risks and we asked a few questions. Then it was time to get lunch and head to Art for the Heart.

We got Charlotte to bed around 9:30 after a bath, watching Mirror Mirror and swabbing her whole body with special antibacterial wipes.

We are expected at the hospital at 6 a.m. tomorrow. We’ll keep you posted periodically. If we don’t answer your texts or phone calls quickly, please don’t take it personally.

 

 


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Charlotte’s Story: The Road to a Healthy Heart

Sometimes I’m so proud of my kiddo, I could just burst. This is one of those moments. She was asked earlier this month if she would contribute a blog post to “Life Inside Lurie Children’s: The Official Blog of Ann & Robert H. Lurie Children’s Hospital.” Despite the month she knew she had planned, she said yes. And she said it without hesitation.  We talked a lot about what she’d write, but she didn’t start drafting it until February 14, just 3 days after her surgery. She dictated it to me.

So without further, ado, I invite you to follow the link below to read Charlotte’s Story: The Road to a Healthy Heart.


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A Day In the Life of Cardiac Surgery Recovery

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Why homeschooling at our house will never be a long term commitment.

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Qwirkle

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Mom’s Remedy

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More Quirkle

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More trash talking, I mean, more Qwirkle.

In all seriousness, Charlotte has been handling her confinement with aplomb. She’s been trying to get her schoolwork done without too much complaining, playing board games, reading, and practicing the piano a lot (it’s good for her post-surgery posture recovery!). And pretty much every night at 7:36 she says, “I need to go to bed. Now.” Then she sleeps for about 12 hours.

We finally went for a walk around the block yesterday–had to wait until the below-zero temperatures subsided. She also had a visit from a school friend yesterday. Today, another school friend visit plus a haircut (with a one block walk to/from the car) led to Charlotte abandoning a game of Qwirkle midway through for a nap. Charlotte never naps. It’s kind of against all of her principles (silly girl). But today, she passed out for about two hours, waking up only because Phil tempted her with wonton soup and we let her watch some of the Oscars (well, we let her sit in front of the t.v. and play video games on her iPod).

She’s running a  low-grade fever today–the first we’ve noticed. It’s only 99.1F so, we’re not too worried, but we’ll keep an eye on it.

She’s gotten all of her bandages off, except the surgistrips on the big incision, which the APN will take off on Tuesday.